The Tax Man
Judging by this man's outfit and cheesy smile, he looks like he may be the type of person who would sell you a used car, or do your taxes, or maybe just suck out your soul and haunt your nightmares for the rest of your life.
Buyer's Remorse
When 18-Year Old Kimberley Vlaeminck got a tattoo of 56 stars on her face, she claimed that she only asked for 3 stars and sued the tattoo artist for adding 53 more stars after she fell asleep under the needle. After fielding some tough questions like, "How do you fall asleep while someone is tattooing your face?" She confessed that she was actually awake and had indeed asked for all 56 stars . . .
The Lost Blues Brother
Okay, I gotta admit, this guy actually looks pretty cool with his Ray Bans and sharp haircut. You have to give props to anyone who can get a horrifying face tattoo and still look so handsome.
Looks Can Be Deceiving
Don't judge a book by it's cover. For example, I bet you think this guy is some kind of criminal hoodlum. Well, ok, he did shoot a police officer with a handgun, but he's really a nice, sensitive guy. And ladies, he's single!
So what are your hobbies?
Well, in a way it's good when people label themselves clearly so you don't have to guess what their horrible, crippling character flaws are. Thanks Mr. Crazy-Eyes, we'll hold onto your resume and call you if a position becomes available.
No Mercy
This guy looks tough as nails. You know what else is tough? A little star trail. I'm sure right about now this man's parents are asking for mercy.
Romney 2012
This guy is a wrestler from Indiana who was paid $15,000 to get a Romney tattoo on his face. He thinks the "stigma against the Republican party" will work to his advantage as a "bad guy" character in wrestling. What's more, this tattoo was a result of an eBay auction. So, no real NEED to make a joke here, this stuff writes itself.
Property of Jolene
I'm guessing amongst Jolene's property you will also find a mobile home and a restraining order and a baby. Well, I really hope Jolene doesn't have a baby.
Eloquence
We've censored this to protect the innocent, but, as you can clearly see the buck stops with this guy. His no-nonsense approach and nonchalance are both admirable, and we look forward to his contributions both to society, and humanity, in the future.
Catman Begins
I'm truly at a loss for words here. This person has successfully transformed him or herself into a cat, and also ruined their chance of ever seeking gainful employment. Good thing Fancy Feast is cheap.
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